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1) OGLASI
Učim Ruski, cena 450 dinara po času.
Šifra: Možda ga i naučim
Prodajem baštu površine 2 i po hektolitara. Povoljno!
Šifra: Mulamehohasanbegibrahimović
Prodajm polovni usisavači, molimo kupce da se ne ljute, ako sam omašio u polovljenju za koji cm( pročitaj cm, ne centimetar). NOVO!! NOVO!! Ne sečem sve organe usisavača na pola!
Šifra: Pokvarena testera
Kuvam, mesim, pohujem, a sada kobasice kuham. Prodajem spravicu nazvanu SIS- senzualni, ispodstomačni stimulator, SIS, kratka reč veliki užitak, SIS...
Šifra: Lepi Sisoje sponzor
Prodajem igrice, igrice za PC 100 dinara a za komp samo 200.
Šifra: PC- Personal Computer
2) VICOVI
Kopali Mujo i Hasa za vodovod, i kako Mujo kopa tako Hasa zatrpava. Priđe njima šef i kaže: ˝ Pa je ste li vi, bolan normalni? Ti kopaš a ti zatrpavaš, čemu to, bolan vodi?˝ Odgovaraju mu Mujo i Hasa: ˝ Nema ga šefe Ibra da stavlja cjevi!˝
Terao Mujo Hasu da idu avionom od Frankurta do Los Anđelesa, i kaže njemu Hasa: ˝ Ne mogu ti ja to bolan, mnogo je to dugo, ne volim ti ja to!˝ Kaže njemu Mujo: ˝ Ajde evo bolan, pozvat ću da pitam koliko traje let... Halo, koliko traje let od Frankurta, do Los Anđelesa?˝. Mujo spušta slušalicu i pita ga Haso: ˝ I bolan, štaje rekla?˝, odgovara mu Mujo˝ Kaže samo trenutak.˝.
Pitao doktar babu: ˝ Je li baba, je l´ tebi smeta što živiš pored stadiona?˝ A baba navijački odgovara: ˝ Ne smeta ništa.˝.
Sreli se Mujo i Haso u parku i pita Mujo: ˝ Si poneo mrvice za golubove?˝ Kaže njemu Haso udarajući se u glavu: ˝ Jao nisam bolan, zaboravio, izvini!˝ Kaže njemu Mujo onda: ˝ Pa ništa, ješćemo bez hljeba!˝
˝Koliko?˝ pita Mujo, ˝26!˝. Zatim se Mujo trže i upita ˝ Šta 26?˝, a Haho zbunjem pita: ˝ Šta koliko?˝.
Tutruturututurutuuuuruuu! Ustvari nije, odjavna špica ide tududutu, ili ne ide tudu... Ma dobro, nema veze sad. Kao što neko reče ˝ Srbi to je jedan lud narod!˝, a ja znam da ćemo se mi, ti Srbi, izbioriti sa bilo kakvim budalama, ili silom! Ja verujem u nas a verujem i u mog druga Nikolu koji je rešio da postane predsednik eSrbije. Evo i njegove kampanje, koja je sada u Beta fazi:
Glasajte za nas, glasajte za nas,
Jer ako glasate za nas, glasate za spas!
Glasajte za nas, glasajte za nas!
Jer da smo mi na vašem mestu, i mi bismo glasali za nas!
Autor: Nikola J.
Muzika: Nikola J.
Aranžman: Niko drugi do Nikola J.
To je bilo sve za danas, nadam se da ste se smejali, a sada ajde bre, doviđenja!
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About the game:
USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!
In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.
Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.
Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.
In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.
Become an influential politician.
The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.
You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.
The international war.
The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).
At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.
E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.
Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.
Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.