Esim - 獨秀社『桃色政壇,政客不倫』二十二號刊
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jian0225


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獨秀社『桃色政壇,政客不倫』二十二號刊 (Political)
Posted 9 years ago by
jian0225    
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總統大選已然落幕, carlk 在沒有競爭對手的情況下,單單拿下340票當選總統,遠遠不及同樣是同額競選總統狀

況的 NaxDues ,當時可輕鬆拿下745票,如今 carlk 票數不及二分之一,民意基礎極弱,萬一

在任期內天外飛來一筆奇怪的緋聞而被罷免,總統大位空轉,群龍無首下,我國將面臨空前危機。 對此前總統

Kongou 面有難色也拒絕發表任何評論。但有趣的是曾參選國會議員失利的 jacket1216 親自對外

放話將已中間選民、政治素人的角色競選下屆總統大位,不讓 carlk 輕鬆連任 jacket1216 也回覆

本報社,競選總統唯一的代價只是10g黃金,看來 jacket1216 的狂語已經給 carlk 總統先生莫大的

壓力。可笑的是 jacket1216 加入Cat’ Meow黨許久、私家財力雄厚的他,自稱政治素人,本報社認為披著袈裟的

狼是曇花一現,假設真的一意孤行的角逐總統大位,不過是再次被選民唾棄而已。





倒是在昨晚迎接選舉勝利的 carlk 被總編親眼目睹,與車上的同性密友卿卿我我、兩小無猜,兩對嘴唇更是無縫接

軌,就這樣過去9秒鐘,車體開始大幅的晃動,似乎在密閉又窄小的空間裡,尋覓彼此最舒適的氣氛。總編有點小近視,對方是誰

說不清,憑著長期跑我國政治新聞的經驗看來像是 NaxDues 議員的背景、又像 Tibbers 總司

令的身形,於是總編都一一詢問3位當事人。以下是3人回應:



NaxDues 表示:『首先,我要澄清,我的性向很正常,我身邊很多妹子,還有一個很照顧我的女朋友,所以記

者大大別聽信謠傳。』而後在一來一往的書信中提到,將在半年後參選總統。 NaxDues 如此的激動回應,甚至

提出很多妹子,一個女友來證明自己與總統先生不可能,這事實還是心虛的表現?自在讀者心中,但總編呼籲如果議員大人真的這

麼多妹子,分享給大家,何樂而不為,我國需要如此吝嗇的議員嗎?對此已有人表示醞釀罷免他的氛圍,伺機而動。




Tibbers 表示:『我們一切依法行政,謝謝。』這樣的回應驗證了 Tibbers 的政治實力,非常會打

太極,外交式辭令。不否認也不承認,這種事坦白從寬啊。



而總統 carlk 表示:『恩...恩...恩...恩...恩...』政壇人士認為這肯定另有隱情!!!!!




總編今天都在追此新聞,辦公室突然收到一封e-mail來自前總統" chariliu :『首先,本來這屆總統我有考慮參選,

因故無法花時間,所以推薦吉祥物參選總統。但是因為我已經引退,目前正在處理資產,也已停止參與戰場,所以應該也不會參與

之後的政治活動。還有,我不太喜歡穿內褲。』前總統似乎已經聽到風聲知道本報社正在追查總統的桃色風波、政治不倫戀。發了

這麼一封e-mail給本報社,前面一段總編認為是廢話,重點是後面那一句,這是煙霧單?還是對外宣示他才是總統的唯一情人,截

稿前不得而知。




另外, s110287 接受本報社採訪,問到會不會發動彈劾總統的議案如同17天前一樣?他則會應:『我退議員了』

看來已經被買通了,並不願再碰觸政壇,看來總統先生神通廣大、無遠弗屆。




最後,今天在我國irc上, TW_ignis 公開表示獨秀社這樣的報導方式與風格,造成他個人的不舒服,獨秀社應該要

被解散。此言一出,立刻被婉君表妹們攻擊,也引發各界一片撻伐。總編呼籲不扼殺言『亂』自由。





獨秀獨秀,為你獨秀


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獨秀社『carlk總統跛腳前傳』二十一號刊 (9 years ago)

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獨秀社『箭在弦上,發出號響』二十三號刊 (9 years ago)

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