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Election Report (Old article)
Posted 12 years ago by
AverageDude    
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I am AverageDude, here with an average election report. I know TheDuke was planning on doing this, however he didn't get the memo that the servers are back up, therefore I am writing this article. Basically, it is an overview of the upcoming elections, featuring opinions, facts, and whatever the hell else I decide to include.
So first I want to point out I was going to go over the election odds for every individual candidate, but then I realized, with only 19 candidates, everyone will be elected therefore there is no chance of any candidate not being elected. Essentially, any Joe off the streets can bring in their crazy beliefs, which no one in Canada supports, and still be elected. That gives him a chance, albeit small of passing some stupid law. I digress.

Clearly, anyone who has taken the time to write a presentation has a large dedication advantage, as well as a proof of effort to the Canadian community.

Let us look at the 2 favourites for the upcoming race:


Molson :
An obvious pick for the top two, the Minister of Internal Affairs is a crucial member of Canada, and also one of the most active, insightful members of the community. He doesn’t hesitate to state his opinions, a welcome breath of honesty in Canada. He is also very outspoken on his beliefs in creating a larger population.

Golan Briggs :
Golan Briggs is a business man to the core, and has been around, offering amazing experience, and a winning profile picture. His economic principles would be a lot more useful in a bigger country, but his undying loyalty to Canada forces compromise. Despite obstacles, he will do anything he can to improve Canada. Also, supports letting USA keep CEC for the duration of the rental agreement.

• Honourable Mention: Bolliver Sockwash
Bolliver was one of the leaders of Canada, but is only applying now due to the lack of members, thus he wasn’t included.

• Honourable Mention: Gunny165

Gunny is very vocal, and has strong feelings about certain economical points, but not many Canadians agree with his import tax beliefs.

Now, the antagonist:

Voltfestas

Voltfestas, a Lithuanian Mercenary, had his citizenship accepted by a Danish member of the Canadian Congress. He has proven to be nothing but an agitator, fighting against Canada, causing civil unrest by telling us to attack CEC, and fighting against our allies. He is guaranteed a seat in Congress due to the fact that only 19 people are applying, 8 of who have written presentations. (Not counting EvilGoku’s, one he wrote 2 months ago and recycled, Bolliver’s, or Thiizic's, who linked a Jack Layton YouTube video.) He will be unsuccessful in trying to pass dumb laws, but he unfortunately collects 5 gold from “winning a spot”. Now, he can allow a PTO of Canada by granting citizenship to enemies.

Newcomers:

Only people who wrote actual Congress representations are considered.

TheDuke :
TheDuke believes that Canada has a very weak economy, and wants to improve the job, product, and monetary markets, particularly the monetary market. He is guaranteed a seat in Congress, and five gold. You will not believe how far that five gold will go for this man.

AverageDude :
(Warning, large amounts of horn tooting imminent.)
The AverageDude is a loving candidate, who is vocal about several matters on the Canadian economy. He not only knows what he wants to change, but how he plans on changing it. This man will stop at nothing to politically reform Canada. He is an aspiring business man, who makes iron in the US, and tries to sell it in Canada. No one knows where he will go next, but he will put the weight of an economically struggling country on his back, all the while trying to help his country win sWorld War I.

Thanks for reading,
Your AverageRedactor



Previous article:
My Views On the Canadian Economy (12 years ago)

Next article:
Bolliver Sockwash (12 years ago)

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