Esim - 31.10.2012. [FUN]
Login:
Password:

Forgot password Register

Article

WarNinja


Redactor

80


18
31.10.2012. [FUN] (Old article)
Posted 12 years ago by
WarNinja    
Report




Dobro vece........Kako zivot??? Evo ponovo nastavljamo po starom......ako vas smaram slobodno recite........

Pa da pocnemo:













































I par viceva:

Vrhunac pijanstva je kada zoves konobara da ti donese vrata da izadjes iz kafane....


Otišli Mujo i Haso u lov i Haso se sruši, a Mujo zove hitnu:
- Halo hitna, prijatelj mi se srušio i ne diše.
- Polako, prvo moramo biti sigurni da je mrtav......
Booooooom.......
- Dobro i šta sad?


Vratio se Mujo iz Njemačke pun para.
- Odakle ti tolike pare? - pita ga Haso.
- Čistim atomske bombe. - reče Mujo.
- A što te nije strah da ta bomba ne eksplodira?
- A baš mene briga, nije moja.....


Jednom je zmija otrovnica ujela Chucka Norrisa.Poslije pet bolnih dana,zmija je umrla.


Degustator vina kod jednog poznatog veletrgovca vinom je umro i firma je objavila oglas za zapošljenje novog degustatora. Za posao se prijavio smrdljivi, prljavi pijanac. Direktor firme smišljao je način kako da ga odbije. Dali su mu čašu vina da proba, i on se izjasni:
- Muškat, tri godine star, uzgojen na sjevernom obronku, odnjegovan u čeličnoj bačvi. Niska kvaliteta, ali prihvatljiv.
- Tačno. – okrene se direktor ka sekretarici – Dajte mu još jednu čašu na probu!
- Kabernet, osam godina star, jugozapadni obronak, hrastove bačve, zrenje na 8°C. Još tri godine zrenja i pokazat će najbolje rezultate…
- Tačno.
Treća čaša…
- Bijeli šampanjski pinot, visoke kakvoće i ekskluzivan. – hladnokrvno reče pijanac.
Direktor je bio zapanjen. Namignuo je sekretarici i nešto joj šapnuo. Ona izađe iz sobe i vrati se s čašom žute tečnosti. Pijanac proba, pa kaže:
- Plavuša, 26 godina. Treći mjesec u drugom stanju i ako mi ne date posao, reći ću tko je otac!


Prilazi klinac panduru i kaze
-Ciko ciko jel ovo vasa kapa?
-Nije ja sam svoje maloprije izgubio.....


Zasto se Hitler ubio?
Vidio je racun za plin.


Ulazi krava na stakamau restoran i kaze
-Ko je narucio koljenicu, da mu [piiiiiiip] majku?!....


Bilo pleme indijanaca s vracem na celu. Priblizavala se zima te stoga zapitaju vraca kakva ce biti, a vrac im kaze: --------Hladna, ostra, idite i skupite drva.
Indijanci to urade i rastrce se po planini i nakupe drva. Dode zima i bila pravo topla te se indijanci naljute na vraca i kazu mu ako ih za*ebe jos jednom da ce ga ubiti. Priblizavala se i druga zima te zbog toga zapitaju indijanci vraca kakva ce biti, a on sav u strahu kaze
-Bit ce jaka i ostra, skupite drva.
Indijanci se rastrce po planini i skupe ih. Da bi znao kakva ce biti, spusti se vrac u grad i upita meteorologa kakva ce biti zima, a on mu kaze da ce biti jaka i ostra.
Na to ga upita vrac:
-A kako znas?, a on mu odgovori:
-Pogledaj indijance na planini kako trce i skupljaju drva.......


Kako policajac muci muhu?
Zatvori je u teglu i lize go*no.




[b]S postovanjem
WarNinja

Previous article:
30.10.2012. (12 years ago)

Next article:
1.11.2012. [FUN] (12 years ago)

ESim
or
Register for free:
Only letters, numbers, underscore and space are allowed (A-Z,a-z,0-9,_,' ')
Show more

By clicking 'Sign Up!', you agree to the Rules and that you have read the Privacy Policy.

About the game:


USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!

In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.

Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.

Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.


In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.

"E-Sim is one of the most unique browser games out there"

Become an influential politician.

The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.


You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.

The international war.

The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).


At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.

E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.


Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.


Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.


forum | Terms of Service | Privacy policy | Support | Wikia | Alpha | Luxia | Primera | Secura | Suna | Viva | Lima | Elysia | esim political game
PLAY ON